Do mountain goats hibernate? Time for Goatboy to wake up and share his summer.

As I sign the contract to drive the Red Bus for yet another summer thru the heart of Glacier Park for three months, it reminds me how remiss I’ve been with my faithful followers out there. I’ve got a couple of dozen drafts I’ll be finishing up and throwing your way, but let’s have a little taste of what is to come.

This year, I kayaked more miles than I hiked. Yep. Over a hundred miles on St Mary Lake. Some moments were glorious. Others were quite horrifying. But every single one was worth it.

St. Mary Lake is 10 miles long, fairly narrow, and only a few miles from the continental divide. It’s defined by wind. Always blowing. But if you time it right and are lucky, you can catch a little magic.

But if you don’t time it right or guess which way the wind’s going to blow, you can catch the full wrath. What can take an hour to paddle up can take you 3 hours to return.

And nature’s fury can manifest as some pretty scary 3-foot waves and whitecaps. I made a few marginal choices. That’s what happens when the heart wants what the heart wants.

What hiking I did get in was pretty awesome as well. I did a few of my favorite trails and even knocked out a couple of summits. I was finding it hard to balance the whole water-versus-land thing. I like the water so much. And it was so much easier on my knees.

The summer rain made up for the modest snowpack, and the mountains came alive with a beargrass bloom the likes I have never seen before (and I’ve been coming to Glacier a LONG time).

Due to major infrastructure construction projects, the Many Glacier Valley was pretty much off-limits to tourists and hikers this year. Nobody could get to the trails. It was amazingly quiet. When you only see a dozen people on your way to Iceberg Lake and back, it feels like the zombie apocalypse has finally hit. And only took with it the people you don’t like.

The big bonus was that the wildlife got a big break—lots of animals near the trails. I saw bears foraging, as if I wasn’t even there. Of course, it helps that all that rain we had made the berry harvest incredible. There were huckleberries the size of my thumbnail in mid-August. And the bears had so many that they were left on the bush to rot.

The Delica was literally made for Glacier National Park. I don’t think the Japanese knew that when they produced them back in the late 90s. Deli climbed every hill and looked darn good doing it. I got lots of funny head turns. I assume it was the van and not me.

If the weather was too stormy, I’d sit in the back and do a little journaling or get caught up on some reading. It’s Glacier Park – try to find a bad view.

I think all of the branding I did on the van paid off. When I look at my website metrics, there were definite spikes throughout the summer. I don’t see Goat Boy becoming a household name anytime soon. But I think people might adopt it for their dogs.

The four-wheel-drive capability came in handy when I had to access a climbing route on the Blackfoot Reservation. Naturally, I play by the rules, and I always have a current tribal recreation permit. I get one every year now, regardless. I think a little tribal respect is lacking when people visit the Park.

I did get a chance to test out the weight capacity of the custom platform rack I built for the top of the Delica. I now have proof that it can hold at least 350 lb. plus of dumbass and idiot.

It was good to be back on old bus 94 again this season. I guess that makes it the fourth summer I’ve been behind the wheel. Kind of feels like going home. If my home were very old and leaked and drank oil and was just barely safe enough not to kill me.

But at the end of the day, when I have her up at Logan Pass, it feels so natural. Like it just belongs. And it’s like I never left. I think all we need in life are a few constants that never change. Something to kind of ground us and keep the constant static and distractions of the busy world in perspective. This old bus is just a giant red seven-ton mental bookmark to my happy place.

I wasn’t kidding about a leak. We had a lot of rain this summer, and I had a lot of wet guests on the bus. But I just referred to it as part of the immersive experience. Nothing like paying to be waterboarded in a moving antique. Lots of extra towels cemented the experience.

The old bus is aging gracefully. Fortunately, I can make some small fixes along the way. But now and then, you get something that it’s better to have the shop handle if they have the time.

I’ve been throwing some spare tools in my red bus driver kit. I find it’s sometimes nice to be able to swap a mirror from side to side so you don’t have to drive down the Going-to-the-Sun Road blind after being clipped by a moron with his tow mirrors out.

And there you go. Just a little snippet of the things to come. Lots of stories this season. I always think it is amazing that I can find something new in a place I’ve been going to for over 40 years now. And this season, there was some really cool stuff I didn’t expect.

Goatboy out!

Almost forgot: Patrick sucks!

( For those of you coming into this joke late, this is Patrick Ward from one of the Carolinas. Not some other Patricks I know from New York. He only reads my blog posts when I mention him. So I’m making sure to include his name in each one this season. Making the search feature on my blog useless. )