Paper towels. They say more about personal freedom than you think.

Let me remind you I’m not driving a Jammer this summer. But that incredible 2019 Ford E350 Super Duty Transit HD 14 passenger high top with the 3.5 v6 and dual rear wheels in fire engine red. Living the dream

I’ve gotten a very good feel for it over the last 6000 miles, and know just how fast I can take every one of the 43 curves on the Going to the Sun Road between the West Gate and the top of Lake McDonald.

I also know on which of the 29 blind corners I need to hug what little shoulder there is to avoid the oncoming traffic. Traffic that ALWAYS has at least one tire on my side of the double yellow and doing ten to fifteen miles over the limit.

My familiarity with this machine makes me spot all of the others Ford Transits in the park this summer, and how most are configured for camping. So naturally I start to look at the other players in the van realm: Sprinters, Rams, and all of the other unbadged 1 ton extended van camping conversions that every manufacturer in the world is now building.

What’s better than a motorhome in the new normal? A world where people can work from anywhere? What does the vagabond workforce desire? Well, something smaller (but not too small) that can go anywhere you would want (except for parking lots).

It must offer you endless freedom of the road. And from what I’m seeing of the camper van crowd as I drive in Glacier this summer, that is some big big business.

Sure, lots of mid 80’s VW Westphalia’s still hanging onto their glory years roaming the Sun Road. Still forever boxy and underpowered, but people still love them.

But many more big vans that mimic their features closely while offering endless configurations too cool to count have appeared.

Roof racks, bike racks, kayak racks, rear hitch cargo carriers, front hitch cargo carries, swing door kitchens, and don’t start me on loft beds. Then there is the explosion of rooftop pop-up tents, solar panels, and what appear to be some Mad Maxx looking HVAC systems.

I pulled up a couple couple conversion .coms from the decals the builders so love to plaster everywhere. You can get some amazing stuff. For for a price. Most of the packages were starting out at about 80k, but to be a real player you’ll be dropping at least 120k and more likely 175k to get anything to truly set you free.

A freedom that you not only deserve, but is your American birthright to wield. Go-big or go-home has never been so prevalent. These go-anywhere do-anything off-the-grid home-away-from-homes are the hot ticket in pandemic-America.

But, like everyone who buys a 4×4 truck that they never put into 4×4 except to climb that one hill during a snowy city commute once every seven years, how much of this freedom is really being used? Better question yet, for me personally, am I ready for that kind of freedom?

Do I yearn, pine, lament for all the freedom I’m missing? Or is freedom just another word for …… nothing left to buy on a 96-month loan with 20% down?

I’ve come to the conclusion I’m the kind of guy who wants to buy a car trailer and drag the Figaro around from place to place and experience the country thru the windshield of a Japanese clown car. Take it thru the best parts of the National Parks, and hit every last one of the dwindling drive-in movie theaters.

Maybe put on a fez and throw candy out the window when I sneak into a local small town parade.

Better yet, put a roof top tent up on the Dodge so I would have the opportunity (and at least the ‘appearance’ of freedom. That’s right, being able to stay anywhere at any time. Would cost a lot less than a full camper van, and I could fool people into thinking I am living whatever the hell they all think the American dream of camping freedom is.

Of course, I would need a ladder to access it. Ugh. More baggage.

See, it’s already getting to be too much of an effort to pose a hate/like image for some stranger’s social media feed. Like those Subaru owners who slip on their Birkenstocks and then lift open the tailgate so everyone can see their three hundred dollar Yeti cooler with the big bumper sticker that says ‘F*** the Man’. Hmmm. Don’t you have to be the man to afford those sandals and cooler?

I don’t need my ten seconds of internet fame. Just a nice cold IPA with a wonderful view.

Oh, the other day I saw a camper conversion van with full kitchen off the back swing doors. Pretty massive set up. The doors were open and I saw they had built a special cubby that held exactly 3 rolls paper towels.

Hmmm. Commonly sold in even numbers? Where do you keep the spare rolls from the Costco pack? Hmmm.

And they were eating hot dogs. I guess the lesson is that the freedom of the road is all about tradeoffs when it comes to those spendy conversion vans. I prefer to sleep at Motel 8 in a real bed with a shower. And eat stake.

I love Sundays. Gives me a chance to throw out the weekly stats. Only 25 days left.

Current as of:	8/8/2021		Last Day:	9/2/2021		Days Left:	25
Category	Count	Miles	Elv Gain/Loss	Hours	Avg Grade	Avg MPH	Drive Miles
Hikes	16	187.6	39,975	77.4	8.1%	2.42	845.0
Climbs	10	111.3	31,859	68.2	10.8%	1.63	960.0
Down Days	11						180.0
Totals	37	298.9	71,834	145.5	9.1%	2.05	1985.0