All right all right all right. Do you know what I like . . . . . . . .

To finish that famous quote by Matthew McConaughey: Do you know what I like about high school girls? I get older, and they stay the same age. So much is wrong with this picture that makes it so right. Like the Ocean Pacific white corduroy shorts. Or the custom green T-shirt with the first paragraph of the Odyssey by Homer silk screened on it (in Latin, to pump up the nerd factor). Or maybe even the vast horse mural across the hood of that fierce cream-colored 1976 Mustang four-cylinder. With the bare feet and patchy facial hair, I can still hear 1984 screaming at me to shut up and buckle up. Life is just getting started, and it will be a hell of a ride. All right, all right, all right.

And now I live in Green Acres. Is the ride over? Damn. Too soon. I wasted some good hair. I should have called Whitesnake back.